I thank Mama for today’s stories.

I don’t know who they were, but when I was a kid, every summer a family group came and ‘camped’ in a grove not far away, and Mom said they were Gypsies, and they ‘stole’ kids, and blonde ones were considered special for they brought good luck to the group, and there I was with hair so white, it could snow on me and no one would notice.

Every kid in the neighborhood had been told the same story, and we all were so scared we didn’t step outside as long as ‘they’ were near. Our area was so quiet you’d never known there was a kid for miles, and to this day if I’m among beautiful, dark, curly haired people I shiver and want to run home and lock the doors.   And I’m now no ‘kid’, nor have white hair, but oh, the power of tales learned from our Moms.

The next story I tell is not something she told me, but because she refused to even hear or answer my questions, she also made it more mysterious and interesting.. I know now, that she had no idea what to tell that dang kid with her persistent questions, but, there was this certain house that we passed every day, and I knew that house had more chimneys and ‘outside’ doors than any it needed.

It bugged my childish mind because Mom would not talk about it. You see, that house had all those chimneys, as well as seven outside doors. and I asked and asked and asked, and no one would even acknowledge the oddness of it.

My parents would ignore me, talk about something, anything else, so I knew there was something I wasn’t supposed to know, and only when I was older did I know it had been built when polygamous homes were needed, and to ‘keep peace in the family’, some poor man had had to give every one of his seven wives, her own place to cook, and her own ‘front’ door.

Now I laugh and wonder why those seven women didn’t gang up and let that man know how much power there is in numbers, but people didn’t do that kind of thing ‘back then’. Anyway, when parents dodge their kid’s questions, those kids know there is something behind the silence, and so stories get bigger and better, Like this one. For though an Arctic Circle restaurant  sits there today, I never pass that corner without thinking of all those chimneys, and that poor cuss with seven wives, seven private rooms, and seven front doors, and probably wished far more than seven times that he’d never gotten in such a mess.

And then there’s the Dream Mine hidden in the mountains east of American Fork, Utah. The men reported it to Brigham Young, but were told to leave it alone, to raise their farms and family and leave the Mine for the next generation.

Well, of course they obeyed orders, except one fellow named Rhodes who dreamed over and over of where it was, and finally, disobeyed rules, took to the mountains, and what’s more, found that Dream mine, but could not ‘work’ or claim it because of Young’s injunctions,

Rule or no rule, Rhodes made a map of where it was, and also told (whisper, whisper) a few of his chums, and so the tale spread. Many a man, far into the 20th century, spent months each year seeking that Dream mine, with no success,   There was even a son of a well known Murray family, friends of our family, who refused any full time job, because each spring he ‘had to go to the mountains’, sure that ‘ this’ time that Dream mine would be his. And, in time he died, with no mine. And never had a full time job, either.

Today I wonder if Rhodes just might have blundered upon Timpanogas Cave, and thought it to be a wonderful mine, and never dreaming its value was of beauty, not ore. Who’s to know,  but for almost two centuries men have sought his mine while thousands enjoy pure beauty in the same area he described.

Then there’s the well-known story of Polka Dot Dresses for Burial clothes, and even if you’ve heard it, read along, and laugh with the rest us.

It’s become a standby of old tales, but the first time I heard it, and before I knew why everyone laughed, I still saw that even my mother smiled. But when I grew up enough to know what was meant, I didn’t smile, I laughed louder than anyone.

So, here’s the story: An older woman died and the family was wondering what kind of dress to bury her in.

The Mortician said, “Well, for women who have married and had a family, we usually recommend a deep, royal purple, but if it’s an unmarried, virgin woman, we suggest pure white.”

The family stepped aside and talked a few moments and then their spokesman said, “Well, we want to do the correct thing,   and so we’ve chosen to bury her in a lovely White Dress, but we need to have it sprinkled liberally with Purple Polka Dots.”

I’ve heard this story, told and laughed over by more than one local family, which for some reason surprises me. Of course, I think it’s a funny story, and if asked today, I’d wager that Polka Dot dresses would almost be a standard choice. But today I betcha they’d have to add the Purple dress with White Polka Dots.  Am I right?????

Gobble, gobble, gobble

We’re told that Panic Attacks are one of the most common of human ailments, far outnumbering Migraines, yet often goes unrecognized.   I’d  never even heard of Panic Attacks, and yet a day came when I found that maybe they might be a problem for me.

Read on if you think you might be having them, try what I’ve found works for me, and if you aren’t having such attacks, these small, but oh so mighty ‘exercises’ will still be great. I’ve been there, done that, and I’m still here.

First, we’re told to be calm and deliberate in all we do, and described it as “Living in the Moment”.  Sounds simple, but how do you do that? And anyway, it isn’t easy to convince yourself that YOU might be having Panic Attacks, YOU?  And anyway what are they talking about?

Well, several years ago, I was scared one night, and drove myself to ER, thinking I was having a heart attack. They examined and ruled that out, but then put me in a ‘ chair’ of some sort where my vital signs were continually monitored and watched by nurses and medics who looked and made notes as they passed by, and after an hour or two I was ‘unhooked’ and told there was nothing wrong with my heart, and probably only had a Panic Attack.

As I recall, no one, doctor or nurse, told me what a Panic Attack was or what to do about them.  But I read a lot and have found Google to be a treasure trove of info and so I tell my tale .

First, I’ve learned to ‘watch myself’ and when I feel life crowding and putting pressure on me. I stop for a moment and crazy as it sounds, check to see if my Jaw and Shoulder Muscles are tense. And. if so, I might be on the edge of a Panic Attack.

I understand that those muscles are two of the strongest in our entire body. and are tense 99% of rhe time. We are unaware of that constant ‘clutching’ within us, but it affects our entire mood, body, and day. Every Therapist is aware of this, and has different methods of relaxing them, and here are two oh so simple ones, and even if it’s not a Panic Attack, they relax me and will do the same for you.

And what’s great.is if I’m with other people, no one will know what I’m doing. So, sit down if possible and take SLOW, DEEP breaths.   Watch your torso extend as you breath in through the nose and SLOWLY exhale through your mouth, gently blowing to let your cheeks move slightly as you blow out.   Silently speak the words, “Inhale”, “Exhale” , as you breath, and be aware, and surprised, that, though you didn’t even know those muscles were tense, how good it feels w hen they relax. And as a side-benefit, your mind has become One Pointed. You’re watching yourself breath.

One Teacher called it ‘relaxing the Roof of your Mouth’, and I thought, how silly, there are no muscles there, but, just the same, that phrase works, and you’ll smile to ‘feel’ the entire area of the mouth relax. It’s said that because they, the Jaw and Shoulders, are two of the strongest in our body, it’s not good that most of us go through our entire day with them clenched. Ready for attack.

And then there’s the Walking method. As you take your steps, silently say, “Right foot”, “Left foot”, and so on, with your concentration on your words and feet. It’s a good method, but for myself, I do the two, Breathing and Walking, at the same time. You’ll make your own rhythm of combining the two, and what’s more, it takes your mind off whatever was making you tense. And, again, you are One Pointed..

Another Teacher told that many an actor, nervously standing in the wings, waiting for the cue to go onstage, will bend over, arms hanging loosely while saying . “Gobble, Gobble, Gobble”. and, automatically their Jaws and Shoulders relax. And whether you’re an actor waiting for your cue or not,   it works. Yeah, Gobble, gobble, gobble.

With surprise, I found that when I’m at my computer, my jaw and shoulder muscles are always tense so if you use the computer, watch yourself and you might find it’s a good time to start Gobbling.

I suppose Panic Attacks are hard to diagnose, and so, unrecognized. people seek relief by drugs, alcohol, sex, smoking, hitting the bars etc., and in desperation, sometime think they’re dying, and rush to the nearest ER. And I feel sorry for those poor cusses, I mean the Medics in ER with so many patients coming in, that Panic is usually the last thing considered, if at all.

Your life is precious. Go back and read my two methods. Even without Panic Attacks, they’re worth using. All the time.

Our lives are full of Firsts, from that initial primal yell, until our last breath, some are of minor proportions, but others stay with us forever.

How about the first time you rode a bicycle? Drove a car? First day at school? High School? University? Most of them we met with thumping hearts and though we tried not to show it, were scared stiff.

Remember the first time you traveled alone? Planned the trip, made all the connections, bought the tickets, and then, with no one at your side, and in a strange city, even hailed a cab and arrived at the hotel where you’d registered.

I was so proud of myself that I crawled into a comfy robe, and though I wasn’t even hungry, I called Room Service, and shivered with delight at my maturity. I met the man at the door, signed the tab and was grown-up enough to give him a tip. Talk about Maturity. That was me.

Then there’s the first time death came near me, and I realized that death doesn’t just happen to others, but also to me and mine. And has come more than that first time, too. Yes, relentlessly, it comes, and comes, and comes, and comes.

Remember the first time you made love? Me, too. And whether it was a moment of wonder and bliss, or, sadly neither of those, we remember. Well, I don’t know about men, but women do, and for the rest of our  lives, too.

How about the first time you applied for a job, and when you were hired, you had to make your place in that environment, with no parent, teacher or friend to guide you. Big stuff, those ‘first times’, for a teenager. And then how about the first time you were fired??? Never happened to you?  Well, goodie, goodie two-shoes, aren’t you great?

And then, no one really knows, or cares, but do you remember your first marriage? And if you had but one, again how lucky can you be? And sad to ask, but there’s the other side of the coin, how about your first divorce? Horrible, wasn’t it? And I understand it never gets better. It’s one time when ‘practice doesn’t make perfect’.

How about the first moments you held your children in your arms? I think those are firsts no mother ever forgets, and I gazed upon them, inwardly thinking, “So this is what’s been going on inside me all these past months?”

Of course I knew I’d been pregnant, but for some reason, it didn’t seem real until I held my sons in my arms. Oh, what wonderful ‘firsts’, and still remain so, for to  this day, I sometimes  see them in love, admiration, and  in awe, suddenly remember, “They came from me,  Yes,  right  within me, I made their physical beginnings”.  God, in the wonders He performs,  is good..

Remember moving into your own first home?  Ours was only a two room apartment, but it was ours, special beyond words, and I remember that small place to this day.

Oh, yes, and how about when, for the first time, you walked into the display room of cars and though you had butterflies in your stomach, the salesman didn’t know it, and he seriously discussed your needs … and all by yourself . . . .you . . bought . . . a car. And wrote the check to pay for it, too.  Talk about being grown  up, that was it.  All by my myself.

Then there’s always the first moment you realized you were moving up in the generations. From being the youngest, slowly we had younger siblings, and without hardly knowing how or when, we became one of the middle group, sandwiched between our children and our parents. And then . . .

Yes . . . then, your parents leave, and you know that you have become the oldest generation, and it’s one ‘First’ that shocks you to the core. Happened to me far too early, but I remember, boy oh boy, do I remember.

How about the first time you became aware that you have Unseen Helpers at your side, helping, protecting, nudging, endeavoring in so many ways to catch your attention?   You finally recognize that those Unseen Ones use dreams, words that ‘jump out at you’ from a book, article, radio, tv, or just overheard. They come to us out of nowhere, but they come and they change our lives, too.

And no matter how long we live, there will come that moment when, for the first time in this life, we face that old hypocrite death, and  can marvel at  how simple it  seems.  Death, we find, doesn’t  always come swiftly, but like Sandberg’s ‘cat paws in the night’, comes gently, silently, softly, until  one day we know that we’ve been receiving hints that some  day we will be through with this machine-body, and your Unseen Helpers have been giving you hints that it’s getting nearer all the time.

“Firsts”.  You have yours, I have mine, and I hope yours were/are all quite wonderful. Most of mine have been.

aka product shrinkage

We gotta be wily these days to outsmart the manufacturers of the food we eat and the products we bring into our homes.

Those guys are smart, and dang it, we’re trusting souls and slow to catch on to what they’re doing. Right now, while we pay the same price for the seemingly same size package of some product that we’ve used for years, actually, we’re getting less for our money, and don’t even know it.

And they blithely advertise, “Same Price” and they’re right. The price is the same, but they don’t mention the amount of the product.

But a month or so ago, I read, in a magazine on ‘what’s going on in our world’, that manufacturers are producing the same comfortable familiar jars and containers for our food, except, they are changing the bottoms of those containers, which we never look at, and in doing so they are changing the amount of the product we get. Which is NOT the same as usual.

So, proof, proof, proof.  The other night I was using a straw while drinking a can of vegetable juice, and when I reached the last sip or two I tipped and turned the can to get each final tasty drop and danged if I didn’t find a definite mound in the bottom of the can.

My first thought was that by some accident, something had dropped into that can, and as such had been sealed and sent along to the customer. Because quite definitely my straw had found a ‘ditch’ around the inner-side of the can, and yes, there was a mountain in the center.

Well, by then I tossed aside my book and looked hard at the outside of the can and found, to my surprise that, the can had a definitely domed bottom and not the flat one I’d expected, or been used to.

I think I could have put a marshmallow under that can and it would not have tipped it one bit. So, on my next shopping day, I began to look.

Bottles of applesauce had a fancy domed bottom of easily 1/2 a cup size. Mayonnaise, salad dressings and such were a mixed bag. Some were the same flat bottom we expect, but others???? Ho, ho , ho and ho.   And just how many of us ever turn our purchases upside down before we buy? Or even after they’re empty and we toss them aside?

I’ve read that the ‘trick’ is being copied in hardware goods, also. Same size of outer covering, but the bottoms changed so that we get fewer nuts, bolts, nails, screws, staples, or whatever. If ‘they’ haven’t yet made the change, they’re working on it. Oh, yes, I found my favorite Olive Oil is onto the scheme, one size of peanut butter, and jams and jellies were a mixed bag, too, but it’s a scheme that’s growing..

I’ve never in my life ‘checked the bottom’ of any jar or container as I bought. but shall from now on. Not that it’ll do any good, but at least I’ll know what I’m getting. What else can we do??? And if you come up with an answer, write in.   You’re welcome.

Now try not to forget . . .

These rules are so basic, and seem so simple that it seems foolish of some Teacher to remind us of them. But, we’re human. Who? Me? Yeah, and sometime I forget even the very first rule. That my life and body are a gifts. Give them a try.

1. You will receive a body.
You may like that body, tolerate or hate it, but it’s yours, and will be yours for the entire period of this time round.

2, You will  learn lessons
You are   enrolled in a full time interdenominational school called Life. Each day in this school you will have opportunities to learn. You may like the lessons or you might think them irrelevant and stupid. Doesn’t matter, they’re yours.

3. There are no mistakes , and no accidents. Only lessons.
Growth is a process of trial, error and experimentation. The ‘failed’ experiments are as much a part of the learning process as the experiment that ultimately ‘works’.

4. A lesson is repeated over and over until it’s learned.
That lesson will be presented to you in many forms until you have learned it. And only when you have learned it, will the next lesson come to you. And only then will you realize how many times it did come to you.

5. Learning lessons never ends.
There is no part of Life that does not contain its lessons. You can be certain that if you are alive, there are still lessons to be learned.

6, ‘There’ and ‘when’ are no better than ‘here’ and ‘now.’
When your ‘there’ has become ‘here’. and if your ‘when’ has become ‘now’ , you will simply obtain another ‘there’ and ‘when’ which will again look better than ‘here’ and ‘now’.

7. All others are merely mirrors of you.
You cannot love or hate something about another person unless it reflects something you either love or hate within yourself.

8.  What you make of your life is entirely up to you.
You have all the tools and resources you need . What you do with them is your choice, and no person or any circumstance can change that opportunity.

9. All your answers lie right inside you.
The answers to all life’s questions lie inside you. All you need to do is look, listen, and trust.

10. You will forget all this.
No matter how often you read this, no matter how deeply you believe it, or how often you promise yourself you will never forget it . . . within one minute, you will. Oh, yes, yes, yes you will.

These words were signed anonymous, but they have all the signs and subtlety of some ancient Zen or Sufi teacher. And even if only one small part speaks to you, love that part, for it is wisdom of the ages. In only ten short lines.

Our Ancestors Left The Sea, But Not the Language . . .

So many of our ancestors were seafaring people that our language is literally filled with their nautical terms.

Yeah, and while they’re of ancient origin, people like us, who don’t know port from starboard, not only understand their meaning, but use them in our everyday conversation without giving a thought to their origin.

For example: each of us has more than once said, that someone ‘really knows the ropes’. Now, a man on a long ago sailing ship had to ‘know the ropes’ in order to survive. Today, of course, it means anyone who is equal to coping with some complicated situation.

And in the same way, a person who enters a room awkwardly, noisily and heavily, is said to come ‘barging in’.  A real barge, you see, is hard to handle and moves around the harbor in a most disruptive manner. Just barging around, you see.

We also know what’s meant when we’re told that a person if ‘off the beam’. Its origin goes back to when a ship was stricken by storm and careened so far that the deck beams were almost vertical. And it’s not a safe thing for man or vessel to be that far ‘off the beam’.

And on it goes. In the sailing days, ships were often, for some reason, at sea far longer than planned, and when that happened, provisions would run low and the cook struggled to feed the crew. He literally had to ‘scrape the bottom of the flour barrel’ to make his bread. So, to this day, when one is having a hard time making ends meet, we say they’re ‘scraping the bottom of the barrel’.

It’s also common usage, when confronted by someone who likes to blow and brag too much, for us to say they’d like to knock the ‘wind from his sails’, meaning to put an immediate stop to the huffing and puffing. Which is exactly what happened to a ship when the wind ceased to blow. The wind went out of the sails.

And then, when one is taking a lot of unnecessary chances, someone else is sure to warn that if he isn’t careful, he may ‘end up on the rocks’. Which is what vessels once did if they didn’t carry sufficient ballast to keep them ‘anchored’ in the water. They might sail into the shallows and literally ‘end up on the rocks’.

My Dad used to say, when a storm was coming that he had the animals ‘all snugged down’ with enough food and water to take care of them for a day or two if necessay. That term is exactly what is/was used aboard ships when a storm was/is approaching and the crew lashes down loose gear and close all the hatches. ‘All snugged down’.

Fishermen usually go to sea before the dawn and return late at night. So they took a good lunch with them which included hot tea or coffee, and it was nautically called a ‘mug-up’.

Our ancestors left the sea but carried the words with them, and today, it isn’t unusual to be invited out for a ‘mug-up’. And even if no liquid is served, it’s still a ‘mug-up”, and I love it.

Here in this area we have such a varied vocabulary because our ancestors came from so many different countries and also that LDS missionaries travel to so many far-off places and bring new words and phrases back with them. And we like and use them.

Our forefathers were probably like the old sailor, disenchanted with the sea, who swore he was going to put his oars over his shoulders and keep going inland until someone had to ask him what they were. And then and only then would he stop to make a home. Well, that’s what many of our ancestors did, but at that time, they didn’t bring their oars. but their colorful language with them.

You probably have your favorites, kept alive from generation to generation, and we are collecting more as we go along. No? Well, how about Ciao? Adios? Aloha? Pizza? Tortilla? French bread? Viola? And a hundred more coming on line each and every day. Skole!

Live long and prosper . . .

We usually begin our days in bed, warm, comfortable, in a fetal position, and don’t’ want to stir.   But like it or not, it’s time to get up, and to make it a bit easier, next time try a yogic way.

Wiggle your toes. No, no, no, not your feet, just your toes. And so slightly, hard to detect, almost just an inward movement, but move your toes, and as you lie there, so comfy, in just a moment or two, you’ll notice that your fingers are also moving. No, not your hands, but Oh, so slightly, the finger muscles move.

You didn’t tell them to move, and so, as your attention has shifted to your fingers, if you back-track a bit, you’ll see that now your feet are also moving. Yes, your feet, as well as the toes have awakened.

And knowing that YOU didn’t tell your fingers, much less your feet, to move, and are beginning to wonder what’s going on, for, surprise, surprise, you see that your hands are getting in on the ‘game’ and without consciously moving anything but your toes, you find that fingers, feet and hands are also     in motion.

What’s going on??   Well, what we’re seeing is the proof that our body is one unit, and when we flipped the ‘ON’ switch at one point, the ‘Starter Key’ was turned on and the entire Machine is alive and ready to go.

Think about it. When we walk briskly, who tells the arms and legs how to swing to maintain the body’s balance? . And it’s not just we humans, either, for who tells a beautiful horse, with four legs to be able to run so safely and beautifully. Animals all have Four legs to move, and with no stumbling or getting mixed up with ‘which leg to manage’, yet from birth on, they remember their biological beginnings, and know how to make the right moves. Same with all other ‘machines’, no matter if they have legs, wings, fins or whatever, they KNOW how to manage them.

A few years ago I published a small booklet called “A Machine Called Ethel”. and told of other ways our bodies work so marvelously with no orders from the human owners of the body.

Oh, okay,   you mention the Higher Power who dwells within????? Well that’s another story, and for the nonce, we’re talking about waking up  the machine that the Higher Power uses.

Think of your tongue. It floats there so innocently.  so forgotten, and yet, it knows how to behave perfectly as we use it when we talk. eat. chew, swallow, and move the food from side to side to find other teeth. All at the same time. And then think of that one muscle, said to be one of the strongest muscle in our entire body, the Jaws. and how quietly they sit there waiting for their Power to be needed and used.

Once you get thinking, consider how (at the same time) we breath. cough, sniff, sneeze and talk. Going deeper, how our stomach, intestines, heart, lungs, etc, etc. all do their jobs with no prompting from us, because, anyway, we wouldn’t know what to tell them to do and would really be in trouble if our pancreas waited for us to tell it when and how much Insulin to send forth.   Or, for heavens sake,   what would we tell our liver to do? Or the Bone Marrow, or tell the brain to ‘ get into gear’? Or to tell what muscles to ‘jump’ in alarm at some sharp unfamiliar sound?

Waking up in the morning is just one way that we can consciously watch the Machine called Ethel, Joe, Bill, Henry, take over. with no prodding coming from us.

We are machines . . . . .. and are fortunate, (Blessed) if we become aware and acquainted with the Boss of the whole Thing. The Boss I call The Source.

Was she ever wise . . .

    Do any of these sound familiar? My mother didn’t have a lot of ‘schooling” but these are facts I learned from her as a child. Betcha you heard them too.

 My Mother taught me early TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.

       “If you two are going to fight till you kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning that room.”

 My Mother taught me all about the depth of PRAYER.

       “You better start praying right now that the stuff you spilled will come out of the carpet.”

 My Mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.

       “If you don’t straighten up right now, I’m going to come over there and knock you into the middle of next week.”

 My Mother taught me LOGIC.

     “Because I said so. That’s why.”

My Mother taught me about FORESIGHT.

     “Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you’re in an accident.”

 My Mother taught me IRONY.    

       “Just keep crying, and I’ll give you something to really cry about,”

 My Mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.

     “Shut your mouth and eat you supper.”

 My Mother taught me LOGIC.

     “If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you’re not going to the store with me.”

 My Mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.

     “Will you just look at the dirt you have on the back of your neck and in your ears.”

 My Mother taught me about STAMINA.

       “You’re going to sit there till all that spinach is eaten.”

 My Mother taught me about WEATHER.

         “If looks as if a cyclone swept through your room.”

 My Mother taught me how to solve PHYSICS PROBLEMS.

       “If I yelled because I saw a meteor coming straight toward you, would you listen to me THEN?

 My Mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.

       “If I’ve told you once, I’ve told you a thousand times. Don’t exaggerate.”

         Betcha they sound familiar to you, too. And no matter where you live. For some reason they’re familiar to all of us. Almost word for word.

In just a few days . . . Thursday, the 25th of December . . . the entire Christian world will stop and mark the Beginning of what the world has come to call Christianity.

It will not matter what Belief System you adhere to, from Catholicism, the oldest, to one who might have proclaimed themselves only yesterday, every one will pause and bless the same Child and the same Event.

Yes, it matters not how we debate other points of our Beliefs, we all gaze at the humble Manger, where the Heavens above The Child, Mary and Joseph opened and gleamed with Lights never seen before, and Angels sang songs of Praise.

Just for a moment, let us all stop whatever we are doing. Pause. Take a deep breath. Close our eyes. Remember The Child. The Child who changed the world. The Child who still changes you, me and the world, if we but remember and allow our hearts to hear.

Christ Is Born. And continues to be Born within our hearts as we put aside the clutter we’ve allowed to gather about that Day.

What else is needed? What else is there to do? What else is there to say?

Christ Is Born. Know. Rejoice, and Be Glad.